Pregnancy can be an exciting chapter of your life that allows you to grow in more ways than one. It can also bring people together to celebrate your family’s new addition.
On the flip side, an unplanned pregnancy can be a shocking ordeal, especially if you aren’t mentally, emotionally, or financially prepared to care for a child.
Unplanned pregnancies can cause many issues, like telling your family that you’re pregnant and finding financial help for pregnant women.
Even more, you may find yourself in a situation where your boyfriend wants you to have an abortion. What do you do in this situation?
As an expectant mother, you have several options available to you.
In this article, we discuss what your rights are as a pregnant woman. Also, we will discuss what your options are and how best to decide what to do.
How To Deal with an Unplanned Pregnancy When the Father Wants an Abortion
It’s hard to make decisions after discovering an unplanned pregnancy, especially when the baby’s father is pressuring you. Know that you have lots of options and legal rights!
Know Your Rights
Before you decide what happens to your baby, you must know your rights. In the state of Texas, for instance, the birthmother has complete parental rights. If you are not married, the baby’s father does not have any parental rights. Likewise, if you are under eighteen, your parents do not have rights to the baby.
Only you have legal rights over your baby.
That means that you get to decide what happens to your baby. Believe it or not, there is tons of support available no matter what you choose to do. Let’s go over your options.
Know Your Options
You may be thinking, “My boyfriend wants me to get an abortion and he says it’s the only option.” However, there are many options available to you!
Option 1: Become a Parent
Some women dream of becoming a mother while others don’t give it much thought — in fact, some women do not want to parent at all. This is completely normal; however, in this case, it’s essential to consider all of your options.
Parenting is a beautiful but challenging experience. There are several things you should consider before making this decision.
For instance, raising a child can be expensive. You have to consider the cost of the pregnancy itself, including hospital bills and doctor’s visits. Next, you will need to buy items such as diapers, a crib, toys, and more. What steps can you take to become financially independent?
As mentioned, parenting can be challenging. Most parents find it helpful to have family or friends who support them. Do you have friends or family who can help you with finances, babysitting, or other important responsibilities?
Lastly, no matter your age, you likely have dreams and plans for the future. Think about how having a baby will impact your future. Are those plans still attainable if you have a baby?
It’s important to closely evaluate these things to determine how you feel about parenting your baby. Even if the baby’s father wants an abortion, you must examine your own feelings to decide what you truly want.
Option 2: Place Your Baby for Adoption
Adoption can be a beautiful process, and you are giving a life-changing gift to a loving family! However, adoption is not without heartache. It can be emotional — and even challenging — for a mother to place her baby with another family.
Note that Texas law states that if you are not married, you do not need the consent of the baby’s father to place your baby for adoption.
Adoption typically starts with contacting an adoption agency. The agency will guide you through the adoption process and help you make decisions along the way that works best for you.
For instance, if you want, you can choose the family who adopts your baby. If you would like to meet the family who adopts your baby, you can do that as well. In the end, though, you decide what kind of relationship you have with the family.
The point is you are in control when you decide to place your baby with another family. The adoption agency you choose will help you make decisions along the way, supporting you through the process.
The adoption agency can also help you with other things. For instance, if you need financial help, transportation assistance, housing, or medical care, the agency will help!
Option 3: Terminate the Pregnancy
If your boyfriend is pushing you to have an abortion, don’t let that opinion influence your decision. As stated, you have parental rights, and you are in control. Whether or not you choose abortion is up to you.
Carefully analyze your options to determine which option is the right choice for you. To learn more about what abortion would involve, talk to your doctor.
Situations To Avoid
Perhaps you wish you could have avoided this entire situation. However, here you are, needing to make the decision for yourself. We’ve discussed your options. Moving forward, here are some situations and mindsets to avoid:
Don’t Allow the Baby’s Father To Decide for You
You may be thinking, “Well, he wants me to get an abortion really badly.” The baby’s father is not the one who is pregnant, and he is not capable of making this decision for you.
Don’t Make Decisions When Emotions Are High
Dealing with an unplanned pregnancy, especially when the baby’s father is pressuring you to get an abortion, is extremely stressful. Avoid making decisions when you’re particularly stressed. Find time to take deep breaths, relax, and reach out to a trusted loved one.
Don’t Cut Yourself Off from Your Support System
Sometimes expectant mothers with unplanned pregnancies are embarrassed by their situation. That’s understandable, but you don’t have to be! Pregnancy is a part of life, and unplanned pregnancies happen to millions of women. Reach out to your support system and let them help you. If you lack a support system, many organizations are ready to help you.
What Should You Do?
For a moment, try to clear your mind of what your boyfriend wants or what your family might want you to do. This is a choice you need to consider carefully.
After reviewing your options above, ask yourself, “Do I want an abortion? If I decide to get an abortion, will I regret it later? Is this the best decision for me and my body right now?”
If you decide to parent your baby yourself, you have made a beautiful, courageous decision. However, if you decide you cannot or do not want to parent at this time in your life, know that adoption is a brave decision, too!
No matter what you choose, you should feel empowered to make your decision. You deserve to have the confidence to face your future with a positive outlook!
Talk To a Professional Today
If you would like more information about your options with an unplanned pregnancy, contact Texas Adoption Center.
Texas Adoption Center is a down-to-earth, professional adoption agency that is filled with people that are warm, caring, and dedicated to your well-being. In the end, this adoption agency’s goal is to empower you to make decisions that are best for you. They will personally support you every step of the way — and for the rest of your life.
If you are considering adoption or would simply like to learn more about your options, call Texas Adoption Center at 512-893-7943.
