An unplanned pregnancy can often create stress, especially when young parents are involved. Through all the emotions, many people fail to consider the feelings of men dealing with an unplanned pregnancy. If you’ve found out that you will be a father unexpectedly, you have several options.
With countless resources available to birth parents, you can get the support you need as a young father. This article will explore your options and offer unplanned pregnancy advice for fathers. Let’s jump right in!
Unplanned Pregnancy Options
The first step in dealing with an unplanned pregnancy is to talk to the mother of the child. If you know that she’s pregnant, you’ve likely already talked to her. If not, this should be your priority. You’ll need to have a real conversation about what you plan to do.
While you have several options, you’ll need to be supportive and understanding of what the mother wants to do. Still, you also have rights as a birth father. If you can’t have an honest, calm conversation with the birth mother, several resources can help you come to an agreement. You can talk to friends or family to help or contact an adoption agency to explore your options.
Here are some possibilities you will need to consider.
Choosing Parenthood
Many people choose to parent their child, even when the pregnancy is unexpected. Before making this decision, it’s important to understand the challenges and responsibilities of this option. The excitement of a baby can often mask the struggles that come with raising a child.
Think about the challenges your own parents faced raising you. Financial struggles, managing parenthood with your work, school, and social life, and differing opinions between parents are a few challenges to consider. You may face even more challenges with an unplanned pregnancy when the father is not excited, and the mother wants to keep the baby.
While parenting is not a bad option, it is not suitable for everyone. Having a baby is expensive, tiring, and stressful. Consider your options and what will be best for your child before deciding to choose parenthood.
Placing a Baby for Adoption
Placing your baby for adoption is another option. This has been viewed negatively in past years, but adoption has become a more popular and acceptable choice. If you both choose adoption, you should find a supportive adoption agency to help create your adoption plan. Remember, you do have legal rights as your child’s father. In some states, your approval is needed for a birth mother to place a baby for adoption.
Before the adoption process starts, talk to a local adoption agency for unplanned pregnancy advice for fathers. They will be able to discuss your state’s adoption laws and help ensure your legal rights are considered in the adoption process. Adoption is an emotional journey, but it will provide your child with the support and stability they need to grow.
Terminating the Pregnancy
Some birth parents choose to terminate the pregnancy. This is also a difficult decision. Birth mothers should consider the procedure type, cost, pain, and risks involved with this choice. Unfortunately, birth fathers don’t have any rights when it comes to this option. The birth mother does not need your consent to terminate the pregnancy.
The best thing you can do if your pregnant partner is considering terminating the pregnancy is to encourage an open conversation. You should never push your pregnant partner to terminate the pregnancy. This option comes with a significant amount of emotional and physical pain, so you should be as supportive as possible either way.
Tips for Handling an Unplanned Pregnancy
Now that you know your options, let’s discuss some unplanned pregnancy advice for men and tips on how to handle it.
Remain Calm
The best piece of unplanned pregnancy advice for fathers is to remain calm. Unwanted pregnancy is not an easy situation. It’s natural to have your thoughts and emotions that are all over the place. Still, take a deep breath and stay as calm as possible. This will allow you to have a better conversation with the birth mother and make the best decision for your entire family.
Keep an Open Mind
There is a lot to consider when you find out you are going to be a father. While you may have initial thoughts on how you want to handle this situation, do your best to keep an open mind. It’s natural to be scared, frustrated, or even sad. While you have rights as the birth father, keep an open mind when going into a conversation with the mother. The decision you both come to may not be what you had initially hoped for, but keeping an open mind can allow you both to make the right decision for yourselves and your baby.
Provide Support
Just as you are experiencing a range of emotions, so is the birth mother. Provide her with as much support as possible. She’s experiencing a significant change to the status of her life and her mental and physical well-being. Be empathetic. Put yourself in her shoes and do your best to have a meaningful, respectful conversation. With the right support, you can both come to the best decision for you and your baby’s future.
Set Clear Intentions
Regardless of what decision you both make, you are 50% parent to this child. Be upfront and honest with the birth mother about what you intend to do as that child’s father. Once you set your intentions, stand by them. The clearer you are with your intentions, the easier the process will be for you all.
Prepare for the Final Decision
Prepare yourself for your final decision. If you choose parenthood, this might mean taking steps to improve your financial situation and set up a support network. If you choose adoption or pregnancy termination, you’ll also need to prepare yourself for the process mentally. Talk to your local adoption agency to get the support and resources you need to be ready for the final decision about the pregnancy.
Texas Adoption Center Offers the Support You Need
Unplanned pregnancy is a stressful situation that comes with many emotions for everyone involved. With the right unplanned pregnancy advice for fathers, you can be confident that you’ve done your best to handle your situation. Talk to the birth mother to find an option that works best for your baby.
If you need help discussing your options and rights as a father, we’ve got your back. Contact Texas Adoption Center to get the guidance and support you need to feel confident in your actions and decisions as a father. Get in touch with us at (512) 893-7943.
